Preparation
- Take care of my own parts, see who’s there, ask them to sit back, will come to them after
Intro
- Invite client to see what they’re feeling, check what is happening, ask what issues they bring
- Listen to the story
Identifying parts/using parts language
- Reflect the story back in parts (without being explicit about ‘parts’ yet)
- Sometimes you feel like… and other times you feel like… Is that right?
- So there’s a part of you that… and another part of you that…
Getting to know more about the parts
- Reflect back what you have heard, ask clarifying questions, map sequences
- Can you say more about the part that…?
- It sounds like when that part is present… Is that right?
- So you are saying that first you feel… which triggers…
Deepening your empathic understanding
- That sounds difficult to be feeling that
- I can see why you are really struggling with this
- Does it make sense to you that this part would feel this way?
Contracting
- Would you like to get to know one or some of these parts better?
- Would you like to choose a TP to work with, or just sit with all or some of the parts?
- How would it be if we could help this part… [feel less extreme, not get so triggered etc]?
- If it were possible to help this part by… would you like to do that?
- Is that something you would like to work on/to know more about?
Focusing on Target Part
- Would it be OK to focus on that?
- How are you aware of that part? – Can you feel it in or around you? Do you see it or hear it? Does it show up in physical sensations?
- Bring your awareness to it – are there any associations that come to you – words, images, memories, feelings, impressions etc?
- Does it feel like a particular age?
- How does that part look?
- Is there anything more about this part that you notice?
- As you feel it [in whatever way], are there emotions/beliefs that go with it?
- HDYFT this part?
If the answer is not the 8Cs
= another part is present
- Reflect back the client’s parts that are present
- Can you ask this part if it would be willing to step back so you can be more present and helpful to the TP?
- Let them know you will come to them too
- Now, HDYFT the TP?
If other part doesn’t unblend
- What are you afraid would happen if you did step back?
- What would make it safe to step back?
- Can this part step back/unblend a little/for just a few moments?
- Let this part know it doesn’t have to be the one taking care of/dealing with this other part
- Tell them why you want them to step aside
- They can always come back if they need or want to
If the part still doesn’t unblend
- Temporarily change TP to the one that can’t step back and work on unblending so they can
- Can you give it a couple of breaths so it can move out from you and you can talk with it?
- Would it be willing to sit in front of you so you can help it with that feeling?
- Would it help to whiteboard/sand tray you and this part?
If the part still can’t unblend
- Using direct access, lend your Self and talk directly to the part
- [IDA] Can you tell me what’s going on for you?
- [IDA] Can you tell [client] how you are feeling?
- Re-establish connection of the part with the client
Once the part unblends
- Thank it and return to the original TP
- Now HDYFT the original TP?
- If the answer is not the 8Cs, go back to here and repeat with the next part in the way
Once the client begins to feel 8Cs
- Take a moment and invite the part to really feel your presence here with it now
- Can this part feel your compassion, interest, care?
- Can you ask the part what it wants you to know about itself?
- What does this part most need from you?
- If the TP is a manager, click here
- If the TP is a firefighter, click here
- If the TP is an exile, click here
Managers
- Does this part know when it first began to feel this way?
- What are you afraid would happen if you didn’t protect in that way?
- Ask it if it likes the role it’s in right now?
- Ask how effective it is in what it’s trying to do?
- What would it rather be doing?
Updating managers in the process of unblending
- Ask the protector how old it thinks you are
- Let the part know that you’re grown up now. Can it see you?
- Would you like to show the part round your life?
Can it see that you survived, you’re not stuck in the past and you are available to heal them? - Keep offering help and love to your protecters as well as to the exiles they protect
Firefighters
- xx
- xx
Exiles
- Does this part know when it first began to feel this way?
- Is it important for the part to show you what happened in the past?
- Can you be there in a way that this part really needed someone to be there at the time?
- Now HDYFT this part?
- Does the part know that you are there?
- How does this part feel towards you?
Next
Go to Unburdening process